Life At My House

It all started with a rash and being unbelievably tired. Then, suddenly, my wrists and ankles started to hurt. Since I had never had joint problems before, I decided that I should head on in to my local clinic. I figured that I had shingles or something. My kids had been sick with a virus and I assumed I had inherited a bug from them. As I told my symptoms to the nice PA, he agreed that I could have a virus but he wanted to take some blood just to rule out something else "more serious". "Like what?" I said. "Oh something like an autoimmune issue, like Lupus for instance." Then he told me that my test results would be back in a few days. He sent me to the pharmacy to pick up a prescription for prednisone to help with the rash and inflammation of my joints. I mostly slept and the prednisone made my little fingers swell up like sausages (I had to use one of my kid's Otter Pops to get my wedding ring off). My mom took my kids for couple of days and I slept and added paint slowly but surely to my little bird painting.
Soon the results of my blood tests were in and it was not good. There is definately some sort of autoimmune issue and although they haven't given my an official diagnosis, Lupus is the strong front runner. The rheumatologist is going on vacation, so I won't have any "official" diagnosis until I see him in the middle of July.
I finished my little bird painting and started a new one. I am having to rely on the Lord and others for much more than I like to admit. I really need to invest in more jammies. I am learning to listen to my body more and help it by not piling on lists of to-do's.

"Me & My House"
11x14 mixed media, collage

But even though I feel that my life is changing and that the road will likely be difficult, I am so grateful. Grateful to a PA who picked up on a difficult diagnosis. Grateful for family and friends who support me. Grateful to maybe have answers that give me reason to hope. Grateful to be able to paint. Art is a life saver. It has saved me from difficult times in the past and I know that even though I may be slower, I can still paint and feel the joy that comes from expressing myself. So while I may not be having the best time ever, right now, I am still happy, contented, hopeful and mostly grateful. No need to worry about me!